Coolamon Rotary News Bulletin #36

ANZAC DAY 2013

Several of our members were involved in the ANZAC Day tributes this year.  PP Ian Durham went to march with his mates from the Vietnam War and President Paul Weston laid a wreath on behalf of Coolamon Rotary in Coolamon.  here are some photos of ANZAC Day 2013.

Top: Ian Durham with Christine Lorraine and Chris’s son Anthony who was marching for his late father.

Bottom: Ian Durham with some mates before the march.

Meanwhile in Coolamon Craig Corrigan drove World War 2 Veteran Bill Shea in Craig’s super trike.

APRIL IS ROTARY MAGAZINE MONTH.

Published August 1912

MONDAY MEETING

Tonight we had a special meeting with Alex Thompson as our guest speaker.  Alex attended RYLA (Rotary Youth Leadership Awards) in Wagga Wagga very recently.

Our guests included Gabby and Bill Thompson, Don Dyce, Ted Hutcheon, Susan Glassford.

Visiting Rotarians from Wagga Wagga Murrumbidgee President Jenny Fyfe, President Elect Lauren Slater and two new members who joined Murrumbidgee WW following RYLA, Sam Miles and Luke Weston.

Friend of Rotary Sandra West and 9 Coolamon members were also present tonight.

By all accounts RYLA was an experience not to be missed and Alex gave a great talk and it was obvious that he had a most enjoyable time and made a big impression on the other RYLA students as well as the organisers.

Well done Alex.

PE Lauren Slater, RYLA chief organiser, also gave a short talk on the event and said that Alex was one of the best students on the course.  Lauren said that no one wanted to leave and feel that life long friends have been made on this one week in Wagga Wagga amongst the 32 participants.

On some other news the board approved the invitation to Bernadette Milne, Miffy Clarke and Ted Hutcheon to join our club.  Ted is rejoining Rotary after a long absence.

We also approved a request by Grahame Miles for extended absence as Grahame and Sharon are going to Europe for a holiday and cruise around the Baltics including Tallinn Estonia, St Petersberg Russia and Stockholm among other places.  Maureen and Henk Hulsman will also be joining them.

Below is a brief summary of some of the voting at Rotary’s parliament the Council On Legislation that is held every 3 years in Chicago.

CLICK HERE COUNCIL ON LEGISLATION 2013 CHICAGO SUMMARY

PRESIDENT PAUL WESTON’S REPORT

President’s report

Last week was unremarkable for Coolamon Rotary because the only thing on for our club was a board meeting, but it was a highly memorable one for me because I took part in my first ANZAC Day ceremony.  As president of our club, I was invited to lay a wreath at the cenotaph to recognise the fallen military members who took part in the military operations at Gallipoli in 1915 as well as Australians who have been killed in the line of military duty since then.

I was unprepared for the highly orchestrated and moving ceremony that was executed by the members of the Coolamon community, let most ably by Dave McCann.  After the marchers in the parade had finished their circuit of the plaza and had assembled by the cenotaph, the catafalque party took their posts and a vintage warplane from the aviation museum in Temora made a flyover of the site, precisely at the scheduled time announced by the emcee.

A prayer and several brief addresses by notables in the community then ensued, followed by a recitation of the war dead from Coolamon Shire and the laying of wreaths and flowers by a range of military and community organisations.  The ceremonial bugle calls and playing of the national anthem were followed by the release of dozens of white “peace birds” (apparently white carrier pigeons) which added a most solemn and appropriate touch to the festivities.

I’ve attended comparable ceremonies in the US (I’ve marched in many Memorial Day parades and witnessed the accompanying tributes to Americans who lost their lives fighting for their country), but I have to say I have never been as moved by such a ceremony as I was last Thursday.  Although the occasion was not extremely formal, the solemnity and respectfulness (verging on reverence) that were on display were quite moving and nearly brought a tear to my eye on several occasions.  I realise that most of you have grown up with these ceremonies and may not see much special about the day, but I thought I’d share the thoughts and feelings of someone witnessing the ceremony for the first time as an adult.  Well done, Coolamon!

Monday night saw another great rollup for our weekly meeting.   In addition to our RYLA representative Alex Thompson, we also welcomed two other participants in the 2013 Wagga area RYLA program, Luke Weston and Sam Miles, along with two members of the Murrumbidgee Rotary Club, current president Jenny Fyfe and incoming president Lauren Slater.  Alex regaled us with stories of his adventures with RYLA in addition to the various activities organised for participants over the week.  It’s clear that RYLA had quite a positive impact on Alex, and resulted in some lasting friendships.  I had the pleasure of presenting Alex with a certificate commemorating his involvement with RYLA.

We also welcomed Dick Jennings’ news that Ted Hutcheon had accepted our invitation to become a member of the Rotary Club of Coolamon.   Dick rounded out the evening with a rousing fine session and raffle draw.    A good time was had by all.

Yours in Rotary,

Paul

DIARY REMINDERS

*Monday  May 6th. Member’s Social Night Craig Corrigan on his life: “Nuts and Bolts”.   Club Catering.

Thursday May 9th  BINGO Rostered on: Dick Jennings, Mark Reardon, Ian Durham, Rodney Jarrett.

Monday May 13th Business and Board Meeting all members welcome to attend.

Sunday May 19th District 9700 Assembly and Directors Training at Grenfell.  9.00am Sharp.

Saturday June 8th Coolamon Rotary Street Raffle.

June 23-26 2013 Rotary International Convention in Lisbon.   RI Convention Lisbon.

*Tuesday 25th June Wagga Wagga Sunrise Annual Change Over Dinner Country Club Wagga 6.30pm.

*Wednesday June 26th Henty RC Annual Change Over Dinner.  Community Club 6.30pm.

*Thursday 27^th June Wagga Wagga Rotary Change over Dinner.

Saturday June 29th District 9700 Annual Change Over Dinner.

*Monday July 1st COOLAMON 42nd Change Over Night.

*Monday July 1st Temora RC Annual Change Over Dinner. Temora Bowling Club 6.30pm.

*Sunday July 7th Junee RC Annual Change Over LUNCH,  noon for 12.30.

*Partners and Guests Night.

ROTARY INTERNATIONAL PRESIDENT SAKUJI TANAKA

On 25 April, Rotary received a silver Edison Award for its Future Vision program. I was honoured to receive the award on behalf of all the Rotarians who worked on and participated in Future Vision, which is now called Rotary grants and will be implemented 1 July for all clubs. In the photo with me,
(left) 2013-14 RI Director Celia Giay and Jetta Burton, the wife of 2013-14 RI President Ron Burton.

Read more about the awards held in Chicago:  Future Vision Receives a  Silver Edison

ON THE LIGHTER SIDE

The Nightmares

A man goes into his son’s room to wish him goodnight. His son is having a nightmare – the man wakes him and asks his son if he is OK? The son replies he is scared because he dreamt that Auntie Susie had died. The father assures the son that Auntie Susie is fine and sends him to bed.

The next day, Auntie Susie dies.

One week later, the man again goes into his son’s room to wish him goodnight. His son is having another nightmare – the man again wakes his son. The son this time says that he had dreamt that granddaddy had died. The father assures the son that granddaddy is fine and sends him to bed.

The next day, granddaddy dies.

One week later, the man again goes into his son’s room to wish him goodnight. His son is having another nightmare – the man again wakes his son. The son this time says that he had dreamt that daddy had died. The father assures the son that he is OK and sends the boy to bed.

The man goes to bed but cannot sleep because he is so terrified.

The next day, the man is scared for his life- he is sure is going to die. After dressing he drives very cautiously to work fearful of a collision. He doesn’t eat lunch because he is scared of food poisoning. He avoids everyone for he is sure he will somehow be killed. He jumps at every noise, starts at every movement and hides under his desk.

Upon walking in his front door at the end of the day, he finds his wife. “Good God, Dear,” he proclaims, “I’ve just had the worst day of my entire life!”

She responds, “You think your day was bad, the milkman dropped dead on the doorstep this morning.”

The Crocodile

A farmer in Northern Queensland had owned a large property for several years.

He had a large dam in the back. It was ideally shaped for swimming, so he fixed it up with nice picnic tables, a BBQ area and some banana and mango trees.

One evening the old farmer decided to go down to the dam, as he hadn’t been there for a while, to look it over. He grabbed a five-gallon bucket to bring back some fruit.

As he neared the dam, he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee. As he came closer, he saw it was a bunch of young women skinny-dipping in his dam.

He made the women aware of his presence and they all went to the deep end.

One of the women shouted to him, “We’re not coming out until you leave!”

The old man frowned, “I didn’t come down here to watch you ladies swim naked or make you get out of the dam naked.”

Holding the bucket up he said, “I’m Just here to feed the crocodile.
ERIC VAN SOEST

ROTARY INFORMATION

East Africa District 9200 DISCON

There are district conferences then there is the D9200 Conference East Africa.  This year they held the conference at Diani Beach on the coast of Kenya near Mombasa.  The conference  attracted 2,100 delegates from the 6 countries that make up D9200, Kenya, Uganda, Tanzania, Ethiopia, South Sudan and Eritrea.

The guest of honour was the newly elected President of Kenya, Uhuru Kenyatta.

Here are some photos:

President Uhuru Kenyatta of Kenya.

DG Geeta Manek said  “Lets make a quick, unorthodox understanding of the word ‘commitment’. Commitment is when, despite the warmth and humidity of a coastal April morning, you wake up, prepare and have breakfast, patiently queue up to be screened by security, and be seated at a conference room by 7.30a.m – or a few minutes later.

Still another way to define commitment is to imagine having to create a government cabinet that is to run a whole country of 40 million. Expectations are high, even as patience runs ever lower, because the citizens have been waiting two days now for your final list, and they are getting agitated. You work hard and deliver the list before an eager press, then, without pausing to take a restful breath, you hop into a plane and fly over 500 kilometres to the 88th D9200 conference and assembly. That was the commitment shown by the chief guest, His Excellency the President of the Republic of Kenya, Uhuru Kenyatta. If the responsibilities of running a country are heavy, at least the chief guest’s were lightened on Thursday by DG Geeta’s amorous introduction, which was complete with photographic evidence of connections past, when she was seven years old! You missed out if you did not catch that…”

District 9200 Conference

BUCKET LIST

TURKEY

ROTARY CLUB OF ISTANBUL

CAUSES WORTH SUPPORTING

PROPOSED ROTARY ACTION GROUP

ENDANGERED SPECIES

A few of us Rotarians from ROTI or Rotarians On The Internet are looking to start a new Rotary Action Group.  This RAG is for the Endangered Species of our planet.  So far we have members from the USA, Canada, India, South Africa and Australia, who make up a steering committee.  I am looking to get your feed back for this proposed Rotary Action Group please.  It does take time to get a RAG up and approved by Rotary International.   Here is one of our proposed logos for this RAG:

Logo by Paula Wiegmink – Artist/Author

Our purpose is to mobilize Rotarians and provide global awareness in the continuing struggle to preserve and protect endangered species.

We believe in maintaining an ecological balance on this planet so that mankind may live in harmony with nature. Some of our most beautiful creatures on this planet are being lost because of superstitious beliefs and ignorance and we will attempt to educate the misinformed.

We will utilize social media to broadcast the urgent need to save our most endangered species and we will attempt to create joint efforts with Rotary clubs in the geographical areas of concern. We will place a particular focus on assisting community support efforts for the most vulnerable species on our planet.

Our projects may include:

Save The Rhino.

Stop the trade in Blood Ivory.

Support Elephant and Rhino Orphans

We would appreciate any feed back and ideas.  Contact me on<john AT glassford.com.au>

Rotary International President Sakuji Tanaka

Governor of District 9700  Greg Brown

Coolamon Club President  Paul Weston

Coolamon Club Secretary  John Glassford

Club Treasurer  Henk Hulsman

Coolamon Rotary Club Inc. P.O. Box 23 COOLAMON N.S.W. 2701

Websites of Interest

Coolamon Rotary Club: http://coolamonrotary.com

Road MAPS to Africa a Coolamon Rotary Project: http://www.mountainsofthemoon.org/

Rotary Down Under on line: http://flipflashpages.uniflip.com/2/26587/49598/pub

The Orphan Rescue Kit a Coolamon RC Project: http://theork.com/

Our Rotary Centennial Twin Club Hout Bay, Cape Town, South Africa: http://www.rotaryhoutbay.org

Don’t forget to regularly check our club web site for current information such as bingo rosters and various newsletters from the District Governor, the School of St. Jude’s, the monthly membership on the move newsletter as well as several other club bulletins.

Take your time to watch this video it is well worth the effort.

The same can be said for the glaciers in Africa which I have witnessed first hand on Kilimanjaro and the Mountains of the Moon.

As Rotarians we can join the Environment Fellowship see:

http://www.envirorotarians.org/

Apart from some excellent speakers on Sunday morning the highlight today was the declaration of the Rotary Peace Park in Leeton.   We would like to thank all the members of Leeton and Leeton Central Rotary Clubs for the organisation of what was a memorable conference, well done Leeton and DG Greg Brown with Lyn Brown.  I simply do not have much time to write the conference up here and I hope the photos portray the event.

This was another highlight of the conference in Leeton.  The decorations and food were first class and many of the delegates dressed for the occasion.  The photos do not do the night justice as there was a very good band to help the night along.

We had an excellent day on Saturday with some very good speakers including the Hon. Tim Fischer AC of Boree Creek and our past Deputy Prime Minister.   Kim Saville from the School of St. Jude’s was a highlight for me personally.  One of the bravest women that I have heard speak was Major Matina Jewell, on Caught in the Crossfire.

Great start to our DISCON here are some photos:

Coolamon Rotary News Bulletin #34

APRIL IS ROTARY MAGAZINE MONTH.

MONDAY MEETING

Some photos of Ray Foley when he was at Coolamon Rotary.

PRESIDENT PAUL WESTON’S REPORT

President’s report

We’ve had a couple of weeks of meetings featuring presentations by former members who have hit the road in very different directions and shared their interesting travel stories with us.   Last week, Max Chapman, accompanied by wife and travel companion Sue, described their recent canal tour of the Rhine river through Germany, Austria, and Budapest.  Although not actually a shoestring adventure, Max and Sue clearly had a great time seeing the sights on and along the river, and enthusiastically recommended the trip to anyone interested in seeing historic and scenic sights along the gorgeous Rhine River.  One of the major advantages of this type of travel is that there was no need to pack and unpack their luggage as they went along; they stayed in the same room (on the ship) for the duration of the voyage along the river.  The ship stopped frequently as they progressed down the river, so there was ample opportunity to get a close-up look at many of the interesting sights along the way.

Ray Foley’s presentation at this week’s meeting described a very different way to travel.  As you likely recall, Ray and Maria hit the road about 18 months ago, and have been touring Australia by caravan and 4-wheel drive vehicle.  Ray described and illustrated with great photos the first leg of their journey, which took them through Mildura, Lake Eyre, and northward up the middle to Uluru.  Along the way, Ray and Maria have spent lots of time getting to know the history and geography of the places they’ve visited rather than just passing through and ticking off another location on their list.  As a result, they’ve discovered that there’s a lot to see and explore in locations that most people just experience as another postcard stop.  An interesting dimension to Ray and Maria’s tour of Australia is that when they find someplace they want to explore more extensively, they get temporary work in the area and tour at their leisure, basing themselves in caravan parks or free-camping where possible.  A very interesting way to get to know this great country in exquisite detail!  Ray and Maria have also ventured westward through Western Australia and are planning to tour Queensland next; stay tuned for the next episode of Ray and Maria’s “Living the Dream” tour of Australia!

Next week’s board meeting may not offer much in the way of entertainment, but I hope you’re able to attend so we can carry out the more mundane but vitally important business that allows our club to continue to have a positive impact on our community and beyond.

Yours in Rotary,

Paul

DIARY REMINDERS

Friday 19th to Sunday 21st April 2013   D9700 Conference Leeton.

Monday 22nd. April Business and Board Meeting  Club catering.

*Monday 6th. May Member’s Social Night Craig Corrigan on his life: “Nuts and Bolts”.   Club Catering.

Saturday June 8th Coolamon Rotary Street Raffle. June 23-26 2013 Rotary International Convention in Lisbon.   RI Convention Lisbon.

*Monday July 1st our 42nd Change Over Night. *Partners and Guests Night.

ROTARY INTERNATIONAL PRESIDENT SAKUJI TANAKA

More encouraging news for our fight against polio–the Scientific Declaration on Polio Eradication went live this morning! More than 400 scientists, doctors and technical experts from 80 countries signed the declaration, in a rousing show of support for the new polio endgame plan. Our very own Dr. John Sever is one of the signatories.

I encourage you to read the full declaration and the names of all signatories. http://bit.ly/10WLesN

ON THE LIGHTER SIDE

The Perfect Man

A man walked out to the street and caught a taxi just going by. He got into the taxi, and the cabbie said, “Perfect timing. You’re just like Brian!

Passenger: “Who?”

Cabbie: “Brian Sullivan. He’s a guy who did everything right all the time. Like my coming along when you needed a cab, things happen like that to Brian Sullivan, every single time.”

Passenger: “There are always a few clouds over everybody.”

Cabbie: “Not Brian Sullivan. He was a terrific athlete. He could have won the Grand Slam at tennis. He could golf with the pros. He sang like an opera baritone and danced like a Broadway star and you should have heard him play the piano. He was an amazing guy.”

Passenger: “Sounds like he was something really special.”

Cabbie: “There’s more. He had a memory like a computer. He remembered everybody’s birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order and which fork to eat them with. He could fix anything. Not like me. I change a fuse, and the whole street blacks out. But Brian Sullivan, he could do everything right.”

Passenger: “Wow. Some guy then.”

Cabbie: “He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic and avoid traffic jams. Not like me, I always seem to get stuck in them. But Brian, he never made a mistake, and he really knew how to treat a woman and make her feel good. He would never answer her back even if she was in the wrong; and his clothing was always immaculate, shoes highly polished too. He was the perfect man! He never made a mistake. No one could ever measure up to Brian Sullivan.”

Passenger: “An amazing fellow. How did you meet him?”

Cabbie: “Well, I never actually met Brian. He died. I’m married to his bloody widow”.
ERIC VAN SOEST

Eight Again

A man asked his wife what she’d like for her birthday.

“I’d love to be eight again.” she replied.

On the morning of her birthday, he arose early, made her a nice big bowl of Coco Pops, and then took her off to the local theme park.

What a day! He put her on every ride in the park: the Death Slide, the Wall of Fear, the Screaming Monster Roller Coaster, every thing there was.

Five hours later she staggered out of the theme park. Her head was reeling and her stomach felt upside down.

Right away, they journeyed to a McDonald’s where her loving husband ordered her a Happy Meal with extra fries and a refreshing chocolate shake.

Then it was off to the movies: the Lion King, a hot dog, popcorn, all the Coke she could drink, and her favorite M&M’s.

What a fabulous adventure!

Finally she wobbled home with her husband and collapsed into bed exhausted.

He leaned over his precious wife with a big smile and lovingly asked,

Well, Dear, what was it like being eight again?”

Her eyes slowly opened and her expression suddenly changed.

“I meant my dress size you idiot!!!!!!!!

The moral of the story: Even when a man is listening, he’s gonna get it wrong

ROTARY INFORMATION

World Rotaract Week

Two decades after the first Rotary club was chartered in Ukraine, the country’s youth have embraced Rotary in a big way.

Ukraine now has 24 Rotaract clubs — Rotary’s service clubs for people ages 18 to 30 — many of them focusing on the challenges facing the country today. In Kyiv, Rotaractors in the capital city’s four clubs collaborate often on service projects, including a campaign to draw attention to the plight of stray animals.

Members of the Rotaract Club of Kyiv Multinational take time to honor their elders (see gallery above): For nearly three years, they’ve been visiting a nursing home in Peremoha, about 40 miles away.

“These are the people who did their best for future generations, for us, to live in a free country,” says club treasurer and past president Taras Mytkalyk. “We wanted to fill their lives with a feeling of being needed.”

The Rotaract Club of Kyiv-Centre promotes health and wellness through an HIV awareness campaign, and has worked with Rotaract clubs in Russia, Belarus, Germany, and Romania to raise over US$13,000 to equip a medical center in a rural village in Ukraine.

Rotaract clubs are either community or university based and sponsored by a local Rotary club. World Rotaract Week, 11-17 March, commemorates the 1968 chartering of the first club, in North Carolina, USA.

During the week, Rotaract clubs are asked to partner with their sponsor Rotary clubs on a service project and to encourage a nearby Rotary club to sponsor a new Rotaract club in the area. Also, members of the Rotaract and sponsor clubs are encouraged to attend each other’s meetings.

BUCKET LIST

Rotary District 1010 Scotland

CAUSES WORTH SUPPORTING

Clean Water

Our mission and vision

We want to help every less fortunate person in the world to have clean drinking water. More than one billion people lack this most basic commodity. Having safe drinking water helps to liberate people so they can live healthier, fuller, and more productive lives. 6,000 children die every day from water borne diseases. We want to help solve this problem and lessen the suffering.

We will help find International and Host Rotary Partners so they can do Water Projects in developing counties. Through our fundraising efforts we expect to support these Projects financially. It is our goal to make more people aware of this tremendous worldwide problem.

WATER TEAM INTERNATIONAL

Rotary International President Sakuji Tanaka

Governor of District 9700  Greg Brown

Coolamon Club President  Paul Weston

Coolamon Club Secretary  John Glassford

Club Treasurer  Henk Hulsman

Coolamon Rotary Club Inc. P.O. Box 23 COOLAMON N.S.W. 2701

Websites of Interest

Coolamon Rotary Club: http://coolamonrotary.com

Road MAPS to Africa a Coolamon Rotary Project: http://www.mountainsofthemoon.org/

Rotary Down Under on line: http://flipflashpages.uniflip.com/2/26587/49598/pub

The Orphan Rescue Kit a Coolamon RC Project: http://theork.com/

Our Rotary Centennial Twin Club Hout Bay, Cape Town, South Africa: http://www.rotaryhoutbay.org

Don’t forget to regularly check our club web site for current information such as bingo rosters and various newsletters from the District Governor, the School of St. Jude’s, the monthly membership on the move newsletter as well as several other club bulletins.

Coolamon Rotary News Bulletin #33

APRIL IS ROTARY MAGAZINE MONTH.

MEETING MONDAY

Well this is the Clayton’s bulletin or the bulletin that you have when not having a bulletin!  As I was not there and as I have not had a report on Max and Sue Chapman’s talk I can only supply you with photos of Max and Sue, in times gone by.

Max was one of our most active members and we have lost a very hard working Rotarian.  Max has joined Wagga Wagga Sunrise and is doing some great work there.

So here are some photos of Max and Sue Chapman.

Sue Chapman pinning Max’s Paul Harris Fellow pin back in 2008.

Max hard at work at the clearance sale at Kiambo.

Max Chapman at the open garden days at Kiambo

Sue Chapman at here beautiful open garden days at Kiambo.

DIARY REMINDERS

Monday 8th -Friday 13th April RYLA Rotary Youth Leadership Awards.  Alex Thompson is our club’s sponsored student this year at Camp Kurrajong, Oura Road, Wagga Wagga.  RYLA web Site.

Thursday April 11th Rotary Bingo: Rostered on are: Leslie Weston, Paul Weston, Ian Jennings, Garth Perkin

***New Event:  Friday April 12th TRIVIA NIGHT in aid of the Ganmain/ Coolamon Hospital Auxiliary.  Coolamon Sport and Recreation Club 7.00pm.  $10/head, best bet make up a table, contact Maree Jennings on 6927 3074 for further details.

*Monday 15th April Maria and Ray Foley Guest Speakers  “On the Road Again”.

Friday 19th to Sunday 21st April 2013   D9700 Conference Leeton.

Monday 22nd. April Business and Board Meeting  Club catering.

*Monday 29th. April member’s Social Night Craig Corrigan on his life: “Nuts and Bolts”.   Club Catering.

Saturday June 8th Coolamon Rotary Street Raffle. June 23-26 2013 Rotary International Convention in Lisbon.   RI Convention Lisbon.

*Monday July 1st our 42nd Change Over Night. *Partners and Guests Night.

ROTARY INTERNATIONAL PRESIDENT SAKUJI TANAKA

It was a real treat for me to see the cherry blossoms bloom during my visit to Washington D.C. Surrounded by those beautiful trees, I felt as if I was back home in Japan. I would like to express my sincere gratitude to District 7620 Past Governor Tom Kwako for taking me to this beautiful site.

ワシントンD.C.は桜が満開でした。思いがけずアメリカで花見を楽しむことができました。

ON THE LIGHTER SIDE

In a hurried announcement this morning The Australian Defence Force released details of their latest clean energy developments in an alarming report stating that a new breed of autonomous solar powered wombat soldier will be deployed for domestic and overseas combat situations.

In a joint effort between the Australian Federal Police (AFP) and the Australian Defence Force (ADF) called the Autonomous Wombat Research Department (AWRD) there are firm plans in place to deploy these genetically modified autonomous crime ‘regulating’ wombats onto the streets of Australia for an initial trial period before ‘rolling out’ the wombats to the rest of the world.

Full Story Here

Three Wishes

A woman was out golfing one day when she hit her ball into the woods. She went into the woods to look for it and found a frog in a trap. The frog said to her, “If you release me from this trap, I will grant you 3 wishes.” The woman freed the frog and the frog said, “Thank you, but I failed to mention that there was a condition to your wishes—that whatever you wish for, your husband will get 10 times more or better?”

The woman said, “That would be o.k.,” and for her first wish, she wanted to be the most beautiful woman in the world. The frog warned her, “You do realize that this wish will also make your husband the most handsome man in the world, an Adonis, that women will flock to.” The woman replied, “That will be o.k. because I will be the most beautiful woman and he will only have eyes for me.”

So, KAZAM, she’s the most beautiful woman in the world. For her second wish, she wanted to be the richest woman in the world. The frog said, “That will make your husband the richest man in the world and he will be ten times richer than you.” The woman said, “That will be o.k. because what is mine is his and what is his is mine.” So, KAZAM, she’s the richest woman in the world! The frog then inquired about her third wish, and she answered,

“I’d like a MILD heart attack.”

ERIC VAN SOEST

The Eggs

A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband. Suddenly, her husband came into the kitchen.

“Careful,” he said, “CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my GOD! You’re cooking too many at once. TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM NOW!

We need more butter. Oh my GOD! WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER? They’re going 2 STICK! Careful.. CAREFUL!

I said be CAREFUL! You NEVER listen to me when you’re cooking! Never! Turn them! Hurry up! Are you CRAZY? Have you LOST your mind? Don’t forget to salt them.

You know you always forget that. Use the salt. USE THE SALT! THE SALT!” The wife stared at him. “What is wrong with you? You think I don’t know how to fry a couple of eggs?”

The husband calmly replied, “I just wanted to show you what it feels like when I’m driving.”

ERIC VAN SOEST.

ROTARY INFORMATION

WE ARE THIS CLOSE

Help us create a polio-free future for every child, everywhere. There’s less than 1% to go. This is our chance to do something truly good for all the world’s children – and, in the process, we can prove just what is possible when humanity works together. The heroes in the fight to end polio

:

Global Citizen Web Site

BUCKET LIST

Seeing as we missed Max and Sue’s talk on Europe on a shoe string here is one place on the bucket list:

VENICE.

Rotary Club of Venezia Mestre Torre

CAUSES WORTH SUPPORTING

The David Sheldrick Wildlife Trust

Shimba and Lempaute at Dame Daphne Sheldrick’s elephant orphanage.

Rotary International President Sakuji Tanaka

Governor of District 9700  Greg Brown

Coolamon Club President  Paul Weston

Coolamon Club Secretary  John Glassford

Club Treasurer  Henk Hulsman

Coolamon Rotary Club Inc. P.O. Box 23 COOLAMON N.S.W. 2701

Websites of Interest

Coolamon Rotary Club: http://coolamonrotary.com

Road MAPS to Africa a Coolamon Rotary Project: http://www.mountainsofthemoon.org/

Rotary Down Under on line: http://flipflashpages.uniflip.com/2/26587/49598/pub

The Orphan Rescue Kit a Coolamon RC Project: http://theork.com/

Our Rotary Centennial Twin Club Hout Bay, Cape Town, South Africa: http://www.rotaryhoutbay.org

Don’t forget to regularly check our club web site for current information such as bingo rosters and various newsletters from the District Governor, the School of St. Jude’s, the monthly membership on the move newsletter as well as several other club bulletins.